The Wit and Wisdom of Barbara Bloom
The latest issue of Soap Opera Weekly has the first of a two-part interview between Carolyn Hinsey and CBS Daytime President Barbara Bloom. I'm going to put some excerpts here, knowing that said excerpts won't do it justice, because you really have to experience the whole thing, to get that full-on politician quality that Bloom has. Bloom is here to deliver her talking points, and she will not be deterred, damn it!
The article starts with Bloom talking up the coming months on Y&R, and the events of the charity ball:
BLOOM: We also come out of the ball with this pursuit to find out if Cane, is in fact, the father of Chloe's baby.
HINSEY: Is Y&R going to address how Victor got Sabrina pregnant, when he's had two vasectomies?
BLOOM: Because he's Victor! And those guys can swim! They're working on it. The other story that continues to play is Restless Style...
TRANSLATION: "Don't bother me with details, bitch! Can't you see I've got my AWESOME talking points that I'm reading from? Yeah, I know that Y&R has 402 writers and none of them caught this vasectomy thing, but we'll get around to it. Now, back to my talking points."
Man! I mean that was Ken Cordayesque! She sailed her little talking points car over that vasectomy speed bump like she was driving the General Lee.
In discussing ATWT, Bloom mentions that a big story this summer will be the Parker/Liberty pairing, a.k.a. generic teen snore romance no. 764, and how that affects their families. Hinsey cuts to the chase:
HINSEY: Where's the rooting value?
BLOOM: What do you mean?
HINSEY: Well, I don't care about these kids; I care about their parents...
BLOOM: But how do you really feel? (laughs). I don't want to make it sound like that's all (the parents) are doing, because the conflict goes back to Brad and Jack, who have always had a lot of conflict between them. Janet takes Liberty to get birth control pills and that becomes this huge controversy with the parents. Brad thinks he should just lock her up, that kids shouldn't have sex. Janet doesn't want to have a daughter end up pregnant like she did. Parker won't talk to Carly at all.
So, basically these parents won't just be talking about whether or not their kids should be having sex and taking birth control...they'll be having conversations about it as well. Message to Bloom: If you don't want to make it sound like all the parents are doing is reacting to the kids, tell us about a storyline involving the parents that doesn't involve reacting to the kids!
Next week threatens to delve deeper into the P&G soaps and the casting issues they've been having lately. That should be awesome.
Yet again our intelligence is insulted. Only in daytime do fetuses walk
and vasectomies "don't stick". THESE are the reasons daytime is dead. For
years I have been giving Ms. Bloom more credit than she deserves. Then
again, CBS Daytime continues to falter and I see why.
It's like the arrogance of Ken Corday and the cluelessness of Brian Frons
had a love child. I too have cut Bloom some slack because she sounded
reasonably intelligent, but wow, this is a revelation.
Barbara Bloom is making Mickey Dwyer-Dobbin look empathetic and caring.
I have stuck with CBS and Bloom through EVERYTHING...and my show is Y&R. I
must confess, though, that this disregard of Victor's vasectomIES is coming
as close as I have come to straw-breaking-camel's-back. Victor's snips
drove a half-decade of story...to disregard that amount of history is mind
blowing.
Now I know who Ellen Wheeler's crack dealer is. No offense to crackwhores
or dealers intended. And as far as P&G casting "issues"- when you treat
talent like crap and write storylines that make comatose nursing home
patients sit up in bed and say "WTF??", you might have issues with casting.
BB is the new MADD! Hope she's got some money saved up, cause her
termination is imminent.
The real trick—if one can succeed in pulling it off—is to bring to an end
one's willingness to even give a damn. Realistically, if it was not Barbara
Bloom it would be someone else operating just like her. It's the same ole
tune, folks!
What Bloom's logic is missing is that it's not even particularly that
Victor got her pregnant that makes people mad. If it happened and everyone
on the show was wondering how in the world it happened, we'd be fine with
finding out that Victory's guys can swim. It's like Meg Snyder's baby on
<I>ATWT</i>. She was in the middle of a who's the daddy
storyline, and the longtime viewers was wondering why she was more freaked
out by that than wondering how she was able to have a child, when it wasn't
supposed to be possible...
"What Bloom's logic is missing is that it's not even particularly that
Victor got her pregnant that makes people mad."
Didn't you read the article, lynn? Cause he's Victor! Those boys can
swim!
Well, there's a new way to go. Why not start writing creative and the
suits into shows? Then we could really go the way of pro wrestling, where
there's a long history of the head writer being a character on the show and
often writing the storylines accordingly...It's like that John Candy movie,
Delirious.
So, what did Ms. Bloom have to say in Part 2 of the SOW interview?